cronereport.com

“God was looking out for me that day,” Linda said, “because I called four different exterminators and none of them could come out for four or five hours and I was trapped in my house watching my animals die.”

This is the closing quote from the article Bees trap woman in home, kill her dog ‘Chewy’ as she watches in horror

Alternate interpretations:

God hated your dog, so he sent a plague of bees to attack him and delayed the exterminators.

Your dog was a sinner.

Your dog was gay.

You’re a sinner.

You’re gay.

God hates you so much that he sent a plague of bees and made you watch while they stung your beloved pet to death.

Or, how about: there was a swarm of bees in your yard, and you escaped in the house and one dog escaped by diving into the pond, but Chewy? Not so lucky. Not so smart. He trusted you to open the door but you wouldn’t because you didn’t want to get stung, too. And God was not a factor in this whole scenario.